Fathers play such a crucial role in shaping the next generation. Having an engaged, loving father involved provides incredible benefits for a child's life. Studies show that children with close relationships with their fathers have higher self-esteem, better cognitive skills, and more success academically and socially. An active, affirming dad helps instill confidence, discipline, and a strong moral foundation.
But perhaps more importantly than the practical benefits, a godly father is a powerful representation of our Heavenly Father's love. How a dad cherishes, provides for, disciplines, and guides his children mirrors God's heart for us as His beloved sons and daughters. When a child experiences the unconditional love and gentle strength of an engaged earthly father, it provides a powerful picture of who our Father in Heaven is.
Of course, many grow up without that paternal influence - whether through death, divorce, abandonment, or other tragic circumstances. My heart goes out to those in that situation. You aren't alone and aren't forgotten. You are loved by your Heavenly Father. He promises in Psalm 27:10 that even if parents forsake us, He will take us up. God can redeem the deepest wounds and use spiritual mothers, fathers, and mentors to pour out His love.
Regardless of your background, we honor the high calling of fatherhood modeled by our perfect Dad. We celebrate the amazing dads living out that calling and reflect on how we can continue growing as fathers and spiritual fathers in our families, churches, and communities.
God's Word for Fathers
The template for fatherhood comes from a passage Deuteronomy 6:1-9. This is Moses speaking to the Israelites as they prepare to enter the Promised Land, giving them instructions for how to live in that land of milk and honey. Maybe some of you feel like you're on the edge of your own personal Promised Land – a new season, a promise from God that you're believing for. If so, pay close attention, because these verses contain the secret for living fruitfully in the land of God's blessings.
Imagine Moses gathering the people around, knowing many of them had grown up as slaves in Egypt. Their concept of family, fatherhood and legacy was warped. But now, they were about to experience freedom and inheritance in a new land. How could they leave behind the negative patterns and truly walk in blessing?
Moses' instructions provide a profound roadmap – not just for entering the Promised Land physically, but for experiencing the fullness of life spiritually as well. Whether your journey looks like finally overcoming that addiction, stepping into your entrepreneurial dream, or raising godly children, these keys apply.
Are you ready to hear them? Let's dive in.
These are the commands, decrees and laws the Lord your God directed me to teach you to observe in the land that you are crossing the Jordan to possess, so that you, your children and their children after them may fear the Lord your God as long as you live by keeping all his decrees and commands that I give you, and so that you may enjoy long life. Hear, Israel, and be careful to obey so that it may go well with you and that you may increase greatly in a land flowing with milk and honey, just as the Lord, the God of your ancestors, promised you.
Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
Deuteronomy 6:1-9 (NIV)
Key #1: Love God With Your Whole Being
The very first key is in verse 5: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength." To break this down:
- Loving God with all your HEART means loving Him completely with your mind and thoughts. Don't be conformed to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
- Loving with all your SOUL speaks of your emotions and feelings being fully devoted to the Lord. For some, their mind is set on God but their emotions lose the spiritual battle.
- Loving with all your STRENGTH is a Hebrew word (miho) that means to love God with all your passion, energy, and "muchness" – the zeal you put into everything important to you.
This whole-being love for God is a prerequisite for living fruitfully in the Promised Land and raising children who serve the Lord for generations to come. It can't just be an obligatory Sunday morning thing – it must consume our entire lives.
I don't know about you, but I want to love God with that kind of whole-being passion and zeal. I don't want to be the kind of dad who just goes through the religious motions but someone who models extravagant devotion to Jesus.
Is that difficult? You bet. We live in a world of so many demands and distractions constantly vying for our hearts, souls, minds, and strength. Work, hobbies, entertainment, and even good things like youth sports can slowly choke out our passion if we let them. Guarding our hearts and priorities becomes a daily battle
But just look at the payoff in verses 2-3: When you love God completely, you gain a long life and the ability to enjoy all the blessings of His promises! God wants us having abundant life and overflowing spiritual inheritance to pour into generations after us. It begins by giving Him every part of who we are.
Key #2: Be a Man of Integrity
Verse 6 instructs us to keep God's commands on our hearts. This speaks of integrity – being undivided people of honest character. The Latin root word "integer" refers to a whole, undividable number. Too many people live divided lives – one person at church, another person elsewhere. We can't afford to do that, especially as fathers.
The key isn't perfection but consistently being men of humility who own our mistakes before our families. Don't be afraid to apologize and be accountable to your kids when you mess up. That models integrity far more powerfully than pretending you never make mistakes.
I'll never forget a powerful moment when my young daughter Zoe innocently pointed out my lack of integrity one day. We were talking about being honest and she said, "But Daddy, sometimes you get too worked up and you don't listen to Mommy." Ouch! That truth bomb from a 5-year-old stung, but it prompted me to have an honest conversation with my wife about areas I needed to grow.
From that day on, I've tried to model repentance, accountability, and integrity for my kids. When I mess up, I look them in the eyes and say, "I'm sorry for how I reacted earlier. That wasn't right, and it didn't show the patience and kindness Jesus wants us to have. Will you forgive me?" Then I try to affirm how to handle that situation next time.
Do my kids still see me mess up at times? Absolutely. But they're also watching me model biblical manhood by taking responsibility for my flaws and continually pursuing integrity with God's help. That's the kind of father they need me to be.
Key #3: Be Intentional With Your Children
Verse 7 contains the third key: "Impress them on your children." The Hebrew word means more than just complimenting your kids – it's about intentionally instilling godly principles that will stay with them for life.
One of the most powerful ways we can do this is by affirming our children's identities the way God the Father affirmed Jesus: "This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased. Listen to him!" (Matthew 3:17). Our kids desperately need to hear their dads speak words of affirmation and blessing over their lives.
For my son Jude's 13th birthday rite of passage ceremony, I declared over him the prophetic word I'd received before his birth – that he would be a man of compassion with healing in his eyes. Little did I know just a few years later, he'd face a battle with stage 4 Hodgkin's lymphoma.
I'll never forget sitting in that hospital room after getting the devastating cancer diagnosis when he was in his senior year of high school. My wife and I could barely process the news, trying not to break down in front of Jude. But then His voice broke the silence saying with confidence: "Mom, Dad - God told me this is just a hurdle I'll jump over to get to my destiny."
In that moment, I realized the power of speaking identity and purpose over your kids. All those nights I had laid hands on Jude, all those blessings and prophetic words, all that intentionality - it became an anchor for his faith in one of life's biggest storms. My role as his father took on eternal impact and significance.
Maybe you think you've missed that opportunity with your kids. Maybe you feel like a failure or you've made too many mistakes. I'm here to tell you - it's never too late to start being intentional with your words and blessing your children. Just start today declaring truth over them:
"You are a beloved son/daughter of the Most High God. You have incredible purpose and destiny. I bless you to walk in the fullness of who God created you to be!"
Don't underestimate the power of your affirming words over your children's lives. Speak greatness, identity, and purpose over them daily. It sets the trajectory for their future.
The Father's Blessing
In Romans 8:15-17, Paul says that the Holy Spirit confirms our identity as God's children, just as God the Father spoke over Jesus His beloved Son. As dads, we need to mirror that spiritual fathering to our kids. For too long, previous generations feared apologizing to or affirming their children, thinking it showed weakness. But biblical masculinity isn't brutish toughness – it's being strong enough to bless and build up the next generation with our words.
Look at how Jesus launched into his world-changing ministry immediately after receiving the Father's blessing at his baptism: "You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased" (Mark 1:11). That divine affirmation empowered him to step into his destiny with confidence as the Son of God.
In the same way, our words as fathers carry tremendous weight for impartation and activation over our kids' lives and callings. When we speak blessings of identity, purpose, and affirmation, we're helping unlock their divine destinies.
Does this sound like a high calling? It absolutely is – because we're called to greatness as fathers. Just as God declared blessing and purpose over Jesus before His ministry began, we must speak those same words over our families. Declare today: "I have a call to greatness as a father. I am a great father!"
You may feel unqualified or like you've made too many mistakes. But surrendering your fatherhood to God daily allows you to embrace the Spirit's anointing for the high and holy task of spiritually parenting your children. Let's step into that anointing together as a community of great, godly fathers.
A Fathering Spirit for Everyone
Even if you don't have biological children, you can still impact the next generation with a fathering spirit. Maybe kids in your church, neighborhood, or family circles need spiritual fathering and mentorship. Ask God to give you His eyes to see those young people and opportunities.
For years, I've tried to intentionally pursue friendships with young men, speaking life and blessing over them when I can. I'll never forget a conversation with a fatherless 19-year-old who operated heavy machinery at a local plant. As he shared his life struggles, I felt the Lord prompting me to remind him: "Hey man, you're not just a machine operator. God has so much more for you. You're called to be a spiritual father and world-changer in your sphere of influence!"
You could see the light turn on in his eyes as I blessed his future based on who God said he was. He had never received that kind of affirmation and blessing, especially from a spiritual father figure. Now, years later, he's walking in ministry and fulfilling that prophetic blessing.
You don't have to be a biological dad to leave a powerful legacy. Having a fathering spirit is a calling for any man willing to lay down his life for the next generation. As spiritual fathers, we can speak life, instill truth, and release destiny over countless spiritual sons and daughters. What an incredible privilege!
An Invitation to Salvation
I want to make it clear that the way to be reconciled to God as our perfect Heavenly Father is through His Son Jesus Christ. Perhaps you've never committed your life to following Jesus. If you feel that prompting from the Holy Spirit today, repeat this prayer with me:
"Lord, forgive me of my sins. I'm turning away from my old life and walking into a new life with you. Thank you for loving me enough to become human, die on the cross, and be resurrected so I can have eternal salvation. I take that gift seriously and surrender control of my heart to you, Jesus. Have dominion over my life – I find eternal life in you today."
