Have you ever felt like when it comes to your family, you simply cannot win? It often feels like we take one step forward only to take ten steps back. There is certainly no way to have a perfect family, but there are definitely some things you can do to see more winning than losing in your home. 

1.    Always attack the problem. One way to see victory in your house is to make a commitment to always attack the problem, not the person. If you’re angry, be angry at the conflict rather than angry at your spouse. You’ll see much more progress if you put all that energy into changing the problem rather than trying to change a person.

 

2.    Don’t go to bed angry. “In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry” Ephesians 4:26 NIV. The bible teaches us to never allow conflict to go unresolved for days. Refusing to deal with the issue will only make you more entrenched in your anger so it’s better to deal with it right away.

 

3.   Listen to God. This seems so simple yet we forget to do it so often. Before you speak your mind or try to tell you spouse or kids what you think, try asking God what He thinks. You’ll notice that when you invite Him into your conflicts, everything changes.

 

4.    Try to understand the other person. Too many of us go into an argument set on making our point of view known. Instead, try to lay yourself down and devote as much energy as you can to understanding where the other person is coming from.

 

5.    Try to understand yourself. Before you get too far into a conflict, you should ask yourself why you feel the way you do. Is this really all the other person’s fault or are you dealing with a personal issue that’s making this worse?

 

6.   Always say, “I love you.” No matter how bad it gets, make a habit of constantly saying I love you to one another. You’ll notice it’s hard to stay angry when you’re telling someone you love him or her.

 

7.    Ask for forgiveness. When you’re wrong, admit it. Ask for forgiveness and aim to mend the relationship. 

Integrate these seven principles into your home and watch your family start to win!